general update

hey everyone
well i have been spending alot of time in va. which is great! i have had a few interviews here and in baltimore. i had an interview today with a head hunter type of person. shes got a client that wants an experienced receptionist in ob/gyn. which of course you would think would be me. but shes got two more interviews. needless to say my mom isnt thrilled to deat about me moving in with robbie before we are engaged. but something is telling me that soon as i get a new job things are going to be moving fast. we are going to look for a two bedroom apartment if i get this job. that is until we get a house thing. meaning ill be in md on weekends. ive thought about bringing chase down and see how he would do in an apartment setting but being a hound and use to having a yard it might be hard for him. and robbie knows i want to get a house ASAP so i can bring him down here. just everything is up in the air right now. and it kind of urks me. for those who know me i have to have a plan for everything at all times! even when we went to germany i had plans for us! at least where we were going to go and what times!

tomorrow im back in bmore. not by choice. for one i had a job interview in the city at 9am. however lovely unemployment wants to have the conference call at that time! wtf! so with the past holiday i couldnt resceduale the apointment in time. so i had to call the interviewer and see if i could get a later time. luckly i did but they didnt sound thrilled about it. the move i think about it the more i realize i rather just count my losses and move to VA. anywho the call tomorrow is bc hopkins said i voulintaryly resigned. what ever. i was forced to resign. i was told hopkins policy is that either you are fired or you resign. if you are fired you cant use them as a reference (meaning you cant put them on your resume) and then its false information on a resume. being forced to resign however means i can use them as a reference, and possibly come back (of course who would want to?). but you wont be able to get unemployment. we shall see. i plan to tell them i was forced to resign and when all this shit went down i was told i said something i didnt say and no one from HR would talk to me about the slander. which is bs. i think wanda will be involved tomorrow to go against me and for hopkins. if thats the case and she is trying to save her own job i will not be speaking to her ever again. she has used me to much to save her own ass. plus the fact that i have covered for her. and this is the thanks i get?

saturday is going to be busy for us in md. i have a gyn appointment. which is always lovely. then run home to pick robbie up and be at a memorial service for former employee from the highschool. she passed away the saturday after the stuff went down from brain cancer. shes in a better place now. ill be attending but will be going in right when the service starts and sitting in the back. and then leaving right when it ends. robbie is going with me to make sure i dont punch someone in the face if for some reason someone tries to talk to me. guess its the russian in me with the temper and everything.

i know ive been wrapped up in my own life right now and havent really asked my friends how their lives are. i know for one person amberly i should be more of a friend to her right now. and im sorry for that. i know shes trying hard to help her father and raise her own family. and all ive been doing is bitching about my life to her. and the same with min. shes going through some stress in her life and all i call about is bitching about my life. and if ive done that anyone else please let me know. i do aplogize for all this. ive done it to robbie also. hes been so supportive of me in the past few weeks. well actually since bs has started in the highschool. and unfort at times my pride hurts him. i dont like excepting money or charity or anything from other people. either him, min, amber, or my mom. and i know its hurting them for it. im the one who wants to get married and everything to this man and i guess ill have to learn eventually that some times the other person needs to carry more of the burden in the relationship. i guess im just use to being that person thanks to my Xs. hopefully however i wont need to borrow money or anything from someone and hat ill be able to get a job!!! but i love him so much and slowly im letting guard down and letting him help me.

ok got to go meet him and some of his coworkers for lunch!

loves and hugs!